Dear Chuck,
My husband and I purchased a timeshare years ago. We used it for a time, but, we are ready to be rid of it. Are there any good options that you know of?
Tired of Time Sharing
Dear Tired of Time Sharing,
Not only are you tired of your timeshare, so are millions of others! It is an ironic fact that a timeshare purchase, meant to fulfill a dream vacation, often ends up becoming a nightmare.
Buying a timeshare is often an emotional purchase, not a logical one. Presentations emphasize the benefits while neglecting to make clear the real costs to consumers. Sadly, purchasers are often unaware of the long-term financial burden they have signed up for.
Of the approximately 9.6 million households who own some type of timeshare, about 85% wish they did not. Ouch! That is a clear warning sign to future purchasers as well as a sad fact for the current owners.
According to Timeshare Users Group:
A timeshare is a program in which a group of people shares use of a property by dividing among themselves the rights to use a property for specific time periods. Although the property is usually a residential project such as a condominium, developers have applied the timesharing concept to other types of properties, such as houseboats, campgrounds, and recreational vehicle parks. Virtually all timeshares are resort or vacation properties.
There are different types of programs and ways to swap your timeshare with other owners. Many developers have used high-pressure sales tactics, contributing to the bad impression of timesharing. In an attempt to counteract this, they’ve come up with new names to improve the image: Vacation Ownership or Fractional Ownership.
When timeshare owners lose interest, can’t afford the costs, or become too old or sick to travel they seek a way out of their contracts. But, the majority of owners don’t know their timeshares are basically worth nothing. Those desperate to be free of their properties seek ways to escape the financial burden. Thus, the rise of exit companies, complaints and scams.
If you seek to exit a timeshare, ask God to grant you the desire of your heart. Communicate honorably with the developer and thank God for His mercy if they allow you freedom from the contract.
Beware even of the so-called Timeshare Exit companies. Timeshare owners looking to sell their timeshare may pay an exit company and never see results. The Better Business Bureau is warning consumers of an increase in Missouri-based timeshare exit company scams, citing over 700 complaints from consumers across the nation. The American Resort Development Association, ARDA, has highlighted various red flags consumers need to watch out for when looking to exit their timeshare.
These timeshare exit company guarantees do not always result in successful timeshare exits. Research timeshare exit companies before agreeing to do business with them. Report problems or complaints about your timeshare or an exit company to the Federal Trade Commission, your attorney general, or the Better Business Bureau.
Reframe Your Perspective
Before entering any contractual agreement, pray for wisdom and discernment. Be sober-minded, remembering that you are a steward of God’s resources. If you sense you are tempted to buy a timeshare, wait 30 days to avoid an emotional decision or high pressure from a salesman. Understand all the costs and contract details fully. Remember to exercise self-control; there are always other ways to have a nice vacation that will not turn into a long term financial drain.
For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. (2 Peter 1: 5-8 ESV)
I truly hope you are able to escape your timeshare contract and all the associated hassles of the process!
Originally posted on the Christian Post, September 13, 2019
Dear Chuck,
Watching the news lately makes me question the American Dream. In a disaster, things suddenly lose their meaning. It’s relationships that count. How can I pass this on to my loved ones?
Life is a Vapor
Dear Life is a Vapor,
I am with you on this one! Life is but a vapor. The Bible says we are all like grass that grows briefly then withers away and dies.
My wife’s family recently lost a loved one to cancer. Two others are walking through the valley in their fight against it now. “Things” lose their luster in light of our certain mortality. We are all standing in the same line that leads to the exit door.
Health challenges, the devastation of the recent hurricane, fires, and mass shootings do indeed cause many to reassess their “treasures.” These horrifying events expose the reality that we are all very temporal and so are our worldly possessions.
The term “American Dream” is thought to have first been used or coined in 1931 by James Truslow Adams in his book The Epic of America. He wrote: The American Dream is that dream of a land in which life should be better and richer and fuller for everyone, with opportunity for each according to ability or achievement.
Geographic, economic, and political factors made the “Dream” possible for millions in our nation, which is good. It has brought about unprecedented prosperity, lifted millions into the middle class and advanced charitable causes the world over.
But, some now say that the American Dream has become a far less lofty objective, reduced to the pursuit of material prosperity, bigger cars, fancier homes or simply “a comfortable and high standard of living.” Regardless of how you personally define the American dream, it is worthwhile to rethink it in light of God’s Word.
We have many Biblical references to better and lasting treasures that eclipse any rewards of the American Dream. Pay close attention to just a few I have highlighted here:
Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. (Matthew 6:19-21 NIV)
The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel that displays the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. For what we preach is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, and ourselves as your servants for Jesus’ sake. For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ. But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. (2 Corinthians 4:4-7 NIV)
I want you to know how hard I am contending for you and for those at Laodicea, and for all who have not met me personally. My goal is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. (Colossians 2:1-3)
Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will lay up treasure for themselves as a firm foundation for the coming age, so that they may take hold of the life that is truly life. (1 Timothy 6: 17-19 NIV)
By faith Moses, when he had grown up, refused to be known as the son of Pharaoh’s daughter. He chose to be mistreated along with the people of God rather than to enjoy the fleeting pleasures of sin. He regarded disgrace for the sake of Christ as of greater value than the treasures of Egypt, because he was looking ahead to his reward. (Hebrews 11:24-26)
With a proper understanding of treasure, our lives should be marked by practical goals that are obvious to others.
In the Parable of the Rich Fool, Jesus warned the crowd: Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions. (Luke 12:15 NIV)
Contentment and gratitude are essential in living a life with purpose, free of greed. With our eyes focused on Jesus, the things of this world grow strangely dim.
At the end of life, possessions don’t matter. What counts is that you purposed your life and the use of what God provided to please and glorify Him. Our final evaluation will be determined on that measure, not by our achievement or loss of the “American dream.”
Originally published on the Christian Post, September 6, 2019
Dear Chuck,
I make a good salary but am unable to build my emergency savings beyond $1,000. It seems like unexpected things always prevent me from putting more away. My goal is to have 3 months set aside. Any tips?
Living on the Edge
Dear Living on the Edge,
Well first, congratulations on saving the $1,000! That’s more than almost half of the people in America. Setting a goal of 3 months of living expenses in this account is a great next step forward.
The problem most people in our society have is that they confuse their needs and their wants. Many people have not learned to exercise self-control and therefore give in to their own wants or those of their family and often forfeit having what they actually need, like an emergency savings account.
But, in Titus 2: 11-12 Paul wrote: For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age…
Developing the ability to say “No” to selfish desires helps us lead a disciplined lifestyle that avoids debt and has the margin necessary to save and invest.
Saying “No” to what we want today grants money for what we need tomorrow. You see, discipline is forward-looking. It is preparation for what we need in the future.
The lack of contentment, the fear of missing out (FOMO), and anxiety are so prevalent in our society. But we cannot be satisfied until we look to God as our provider. Recognizing His omnipotence and sufficiency is motivation to humbly steward what He provides. Learning to be content with what we have allows us the opportunity to spend less and save more.
The average American wastes thousands of dollars a year. The reasons vary, but you might analyze your lifestyle to see how you can make adjustments.
Wasting money means lost opportunities for giving, saving or investing. Many people are mismanaging money without even knowing it. It’s easy to get comfortable in lifestyle choices and fail to recognize the lack of frugality.
For some, the burden of credit card debt may be preventing you from saving like you’d like to. If you’re experiencing the stress and strain of overwhelming credit card debt, get in touch with our trusted friends at Christian Credit Counselors. They’ve been serving God’s people for years and have helped over 300,000 families pay off their credit cards and can help you, too.
Simplify by choosing to live like you’re poor. This works! You can create margin and discover the joy of stewarding well all that God provides. Children, friends and colleagues will benefit from observing your disciplined lifestyle. It’s largely a matter of turning your back on worldly desires so you can live a self-controlled life. Don’t complain when changing your lifestyle but give thanks for every dollar you can save.
If you can save $1,000, you can save $2,000 and if you can save $2,000, you can save $10,000. It takes time, perseverance and the Lord’s help. Keep going! Let us know how we can help. We have great online classes you can explore at Crown.org.
Originally published on the Christian Post, August 30, 2019
Dear Chuck,
So, I cosigned for a student loan and now I’m stuck paying for it. Is there anything I can do?
Regretful
Dear Regretful,
Unfortunately, the same thing happened with my Dad and we have not found a satisfactory remedy. He was approached by an employee whose son needed assistance to get a “head start in life.” Because my father wanted to help and believed the story that the young man would respect those who helped him do what no other family member (of this boy) had ever achieved, he cosigned for a large student loan. As soon as the boy graduated, his mother quit her job at my father’s company and he never heard from either of them again. He was conned.
While I am tempted to reveal the person’s name since he has flaunted his achievement by driving expensive cars and living the high life while refusing to even return a phone call from my elderly father about his student loan obligation, I will refrain from using my platform for hurting others and instead use it to warn others.
It’s easy to make an emotional decision when trying to help a friend, family member, or person in need. But trouble brews when emotions overrule God’s Word.
When someone cosigns for a borrower who is honorable and responsible, payments are made in a timely fashion and no problems occur. But, when someone does not pay on time, either by choice or by circumstances outside their control, the cosigner is stuck, sometimes completely unprepared to pay the balance due.
Surety and Cosigning Defined
Surety is the principle of taking on an obligation to pay or to make a pledge for an obligation. When a borrower cannot get approval for a loan, a cosigner makes it possible by loaning their credit worthiness, thus reducing the risk for lenders. Cosigners are simply people with decent credit and credit history who guarantee payment of a loan should the prime borrower fail to make payments.
Responsibility of Cosigner
Consequences for Cosigner
A Few Options
Another Option: Cosigner Release
This is an important provision for some student loans. Upon graduation and once working full-time, former students should pursue cosigner release. There are numerous requirements but this protects graduates and cosigners in the long run.
What the Bible Says
Surety is the primary means our society uses to “buy now” and “pay later.” Many Christians, ignorant of what the Bible says, cosign because they genuinely want to help family or friends.
But, one of God’s financial principles is avoiding surety. It keeps His people on the correct financial path and protects them from traps set by the world’s economic system. Those who take on surety pledge their future and presume upon God’s will.
One who lacks sense gives a pledge and puts up security in the presence of his neighbor. (Proverbs 17:18 ESV)
Whoever puts up security for a stranger will surely suffer harm, but he who hates striking hands in pledge is secure. (Proverbs 11:15 ESV)
The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance, but everyone who is hasty comes only to poverty. (Proverbs 21:5 ESV)
When someone asks you to cosign, explain that it goes against Biblical principles. Use the opportunity to offer to teach basic personal finance, direct them to Crown’s online study and explain that you want to avoid souring your relationship over money. If they do need a loan, suggest they consider the following options.
Ways to Get a Loan Without a Cosigner
In Your Case
While you did not reveal your relationship with the original borrower of the student loan, most often this problem occurs between family members when the student looks to parents, stepparents or grandparents for help. Try to preserve your relationship with the one who has defaulted and left you responsible for the debt. Pray for them to have a change of heart or circumstances to enable them to take back over the loan at some point. Go so far as to ask how you can assist them in getting in a position to be able to take back the obligation for the loan. Since you have no other remedy that I am aware of, do your best to pay the note in full and ask the Lord to work it together for good in a mysterious way only He can do.
Thanks for asking your question. I hope your pain will help many others like you and my Dad avoid a similar plight. That would create some good out of it all.
Originally posted on the Christian Post, August 23, 2019
Dear Chuck,
I’ve tried to prepare my daughter to handle money responsibly while she’s away at college. But, I’m concerned that peer pressure and the stress of classes will throw her off track. Any tips?
Budget Minded Mom
Dear Budget Minded,
Congratulations are in order for preparing her for this crucial transition. Far too many students leave home without a clue how to manage money and are vulnerable to making life-altering messes.
While most Americans assume that student loan and consumer debt is the only way to get a college education today, this is simply not true, regardless of income. I have a friend who immigrated here from China. She only had $2,000 to help her daughter when she left for college. When her daughter finished her undergraduate and decided to seek a master’s degree, her mother asked if she needed financial help. Turns out that her daughter had been able to graduate without borrowing money and still had cash in the bank. She explained that she had been saving and investing for years and had $70,000 cash in the bank before entering grad school!
Financial preparedness for college students and young adults is crucial today. Demands come from all directions and unless students understand the value of a dollar, they can blow through spending money and quickly rack up consumer debt and long term student loan debt before they ever realize the consequences ahead.
Having raised four sons, we can appreciate your concerns but also want you to know that it is possible for our children to swim against the tide.
Make sure there is a clear understanding of what you will pay for and what your student is required to cover. Typically, students are more careful with money they have earned, so avoid robbing them of an important lesson by giving them everything.
For example, if they have a car at college, determine who will pay for gas, insurance, tags, parking, maintenance and repairs. If they’re going to be responsible for those expenses, then they need to find a part-time job. That’s real life! If you plan to cover the expenses, have clear stipulations and terms (e.g. you’ll only cover those costs as long as they remain in school and maintain a decent grade point average). Every family situation is different, but the goal is to grow financially mature adults.
Here are a few additional tips you may want to teach the young people in your life.
Preparing our youth financially will give them a step ahead of most people. Diligence requires purpose, intentionality, and resolve. It requires renewing the mind and working toward specific goals. May they be filled with the understanding who they are in Christ and the knowledge that they are stewards of what He gives.
And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
(Colossians 3:17 ESV)
Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.
(Colossians 3:23-24 ESV)
By discussing your daughter’s financial needs, desires, and habits regularly now, you can help her avoid the mistakes that most make plus prepare her for the next stage of her career without the bondage of debt-driven decisions.
Originally posted on the Christian Post, August 16, 2019
Dear Chuck,
I want to plan a honeymoon for my autumn wedding. But, with student loans and car debt, I know I should not use a credit card or deplete my savings that way. I hate to disappoint my fiancé but believe we should wait to take a trip when we are better off financially.
Should we just wait or not worry since it is the only honeymoon we plan to ever take?
Strapped Already
Dear Strapped Already,
I am so glad you asked this question. Helping young couples get started off financially stable gives me real joy!
My wife, Ann, and I were college students when we got married, so I totally understand limited funds! Our honeymoon began with a hotel room provided by a friend’s parents. We were able to put together an entire seven day trip without debt.
Don’t allow yourself to fall prey to the pressure to take some grand trip. The average couple spends more than $4,000 on their honeymoon, but with additional wedding expenses, the financial pressure can be intense. You can often find very reasonable honeymoon options if you just plan well.
If you both agree to avoid debt, which I believe you should, then begin to look at all your options before you give up on a honeymoon immediately following the wedding.
Sometimes God provides miraculously. We may need to ask for help from others, where God meets our needs through the body of Christ, the church. And, sometimes He tests us to see if we will trust Him.
Consider these examples from God’s Word:
In the story of the widow and oil, God worked through Elisha, but the widow exercised faith in doing what he said. Her obedience brought relief in the bountiful provision of oil which she sold to pay her debts. (2 Kings 4:1-7)
The Macedonian church took part in the relief of the saints in Jerusalem. They experienced joy in giving and the believers were blessed and strengthened. (2 Corinthians 8:1-2)
If you know someone who has a lake house, cabin, or second home, humbly ask if you can use it. People are typically thrilled to provide in such a way. I’ve also seen many couples ask for cash or donations to their honeymoon on their wedding registry. Sometimes that’s a much bigger blessing than a toaster!
Research inexpensive vacation options. A staycation or a short trip to a nearby city may fit your budget but still allow you the opportunity to get away for a few days following the wedding. An international flight and 2-week European vacation may not be an option right now but you may still be able to enjoy a few relaxing days away.
One of our staff members postponed their honeymoon until six months after their wedding and it had nothing to do with their finances. They were married in the fall but wanted to honeymoon during the warmer months of summer. It worked out great for them. If you do this, it will allow you time to save the cash for your trip and avoid more debt.
I’m glad to know you are willing to wait to take your trip until you’re more financially stable. Many couples don’t have that kind of self-control so they carry unnecessary stress by relying on credit cards instead of praying and waiting on the Lord to provide. Waiting is hard – but God tells us repeatedly to do it.
Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. (Psalm 27:14 NIV)
I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. (Psalm 40:1 NIV)
For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from him. He only is my rock and my salvation, my fortress; I shall not be shaken. (Psalm 62:5-6)
I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I hope… (Psalm 130:5 ESV)
Starting your marriage with car and student loan debt is a challenge. Regardless of your honeymoon choice, I want you to evaluate your priorities. The demands of work, life, money, family and friends compete for our attention. Often, we are so preoccupied with things of this world that we miss the joy in living as God designed. We often choose:
Be sensitive to the Holy Spirit. He may be testing you and suddenly provide a honeymoon for you out of the blue. Or, He may want you to wait for reasons you don’t understand right now. Seek Him.
As one who’s been on both the giving and receiving end of God’s provision, there is nothing like it!
We all experience difficult and sometimes painful circumstances as a result of our actions, other people’s choices, or things beyond our control. Even simple life issues can be overwhelming.
But, God, whose ways are far beyond our comprehension, invites us to humble ourselves and turn to Him in faith. When we do, He provides answers to our deepest needs. And, though he already knows what we need and desire, he is most concerned about our relationship with Him.
Trust Him.
Congratulations! May your wedding be sweet, your savings secure, and your marriage firmly rooted in the Lord.
And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. To our God and Father be glory forever and ever. Amen. (Philippians 4:19-20 ESV)
Originally published on the Christian Post, August 9, 2019
Dear Chuck,
Our medical bills are huge this year. We chose a high deductible to keep our monthly insurance payments down. But, we never dreamed we would experience this! Between ambulance rides, emergency rooms, hospitals, doctors, medications, and therapy, the bills are catastrophic. We need hope and light at the end of this dark tunnel.
Sick of Medical Bills
Dear Sick,
I am so sorry. In the blink of an eye, a medical condition can impact finances in ways we never imagined. An accident, an unexpected diagnosis, a sudden illness, a premature birth. These can blindside us. But, as people of God, let us agree with Paul who proclaimed to the Corinthians:
So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal. (2 Corinthians 4:16-18 ESV)
Here are some helpful tips to stretch your finances during this stressful time or for anyone to be prepared before catastrophe hits. Remember, mistakes happen frequently both in billing and by insurance companies. When you spot them, extend grace, but make sure they get corrected in writing. It may take months to settle the accounts, so be patient and conduct yourself in a way that brings glory to Christ.
Start with an emergency fund. Keeping at least $1,000 set aside is necessary. Once you reach $1,000, start working up to 3-6 months of expenses and/or an amount that will cover your insurance deductible. Take advantage of a company health savings account (HSA) which allows you to grow pre-tax money tax-free for healthcare expenses. (It can be used in other ways too.)
Also be proactive about your health. Eat right, exercise, sleep, and reduce stress. When emergencies hit, depend on the Lord and the body of Christ for strength.
Familiarize yourself with your insurance coverage to possibly save thousands of dollars. Understand these terms: co-insurance, co-pay, deductible, in-network, out of network. Know the difference between an Explanation of Benefits (EOB) notice from your insurer and an actual bill. The EOB shows what insurance will pay on a bill. Do not hesitate to appeal charges that are initially rejected.
Quickly organize your bills as they come in. File them in a central place, create a spreadsheet, recruit someone to help you. Do not ignore what you do not understand! Make calls and politely get all questions answered. The sooner you act, the sooner you will understand what is required of you. You will protect your credit score and the pain of debt collection. I have never tried this kind of tablets until the last week – too arrogant to admit my problems. Sure thing, now I must confess to all visitors of http://findviagra.com that this arrogance cost me several months of impotence. Viagra works and it works all right! Even a small dose recommended for an initial phase of the therapy makes me ready for an all-night adventure!
Honor the person you address. They are attempting to do their job. Treat them with respect, but be persistent, never rude. You may have to deal with them multiple times, so do all you can to build an amicable relationship. Never put a person on the defense. You want his/her support!
Whenever possible, get their response in writing.
Finally, pray and give thanks for every way God provides. In challenging times, it can be difficult to see all the ways in which He has provided. Take time every morning to write down what He’s provided, what you’re grateful for, and adopt a grateful heart.
Originally published on the Christian Post, August 2, 2019
Dear Chuck,
I am engaged to a man who recently declared he would prefer we not have children. He believes the rising cost of living will prohibit our ability to adequately provide for more than ourselves, especially if we have to help care for our parents. I struggle with that because I believe that by working hard and living frugally God will provide for our family. What should I say to my fiance?
Pre-Marriage Struggler
Dear Struggler,
Great struggle to have before you are married! My advice on what to say and do will follow after some information about this challenge that so many others are facing.
While I don’t take the side of your fiance, he is not alone in his thinking. It is possible that he has been influenced by all the negative news: the rising cost of living, the lack of savings by retirees, even the cost of raising children. But, he needs to balance that with the reality of families who are successfully living based on God’s financial principles. Fear often drives decision-making rather than trusting in the Lord. Consider the following information.
Axios gathered some interesting data on birthrates and the economy. America and China are both facing demographic challenges that will actually impact their economic growth. America’s fertility rate is 1.7 but, due to immigration, our working population is expected to continue to grow. China, however, averaged a fertility rate of 1.18 between 2010 and 2018 and experienced a contraction in population last year, far earlier than experts predicted. Two children per family are now allowed in China.
In addition, the elderly population is exploding. Many countries are wondering how they will be able to afford the social impact. They fear a lack of workers will make it very difficult to support the aging citizens.
But we should not allow financial worries to control whether we should have children.
Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” So we can confidently say, “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?” (Hebrews 13:5-6 ESV)
God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. (Psalm 46:1 ESV)
Be strong and courageous… (Joshua 1:6, 7, 9, 18, 10:25 ESV)
Hungary is offering monetary rewards in the hope of boosting the country’s declining birth rate.
In February, Prime Minister Viktor Orban announced a seven-point “Family Protection Action Plan”. Some things it includes are life-long waivers on personal income tax for women raising at least four children, subsidies to purchase larger cars, a loan program to help families with at least two children to buy homes, and a preferential loan to all women under 40 when they first marry. And, grandparents will be given a childcare fee if they look after young children.
Other countries are offering incentives to encourage growth of families.
If God’s plan for prosperity had been observed, none of these incentives and rewards would be necessary. He desires that we live a life of shalom, one that is complete, sound, and harmonious. It is not centered around bigger, better, faster, newer or nicer. It is centered around the step-by-step directives found in Jeremiah 29:4-11.
In this passage, we read how God’s people were told to build houses, plant gardens, take wives, have sons and daughters, take wives for their sons and give their daughters in marriage, that they might bear sons and daughters in the land where they were exiled. They were to increase, not decrease.
There is plenty of time to get on the same page about your desire to have children while addressing the concerns of your fiance. You can resolve to enter marriage determined to spend less than you earn so you can give, save, and invest regularly. Saying no to wants by living self-controlled upright lives will enable you to avoid consumer debt and use your income to build wealth. I know Christians who live like they are poor and have quickly surpassed the net worth of those who try to keep up with the Joneses. Others have been blessed beyond measure with business success, inheritance, and proper stewardship of the resources God provided.
If part of what’s hindering your plans for the future is credit card debt, get in touch with Christian Credit Counselors. They can help you put together a plan that saves you significant time and money. Now is a great time to start!
Do not be discouraged. My wife and I had to work out many erroneous philosophies of money. Thankfully, your fiancé is honest about his belief so you can patiently work to come to a Biblical understanding together.
It is important that your marriage be built on a common philosophy of money. Your life experiences, preferences, thoughts, and personalities determine it. Right now, yours are different in at least one area and the disunity is painful. But, remember, God is omnipotent and more than capable of transforming conflicting philosophies. So, pray for peace and unity that the purpose of your marriage will not be hindered.
If you are unable to agree on this very major decision, it will start your marriage off divided. My suggestion is to wait to be married until you are both in agreement on your family and financial plans.
Originally published on the Christian Post, July 26, 2019
Dear Chuck,
My husband and I drive older, paid-for cars. His is 11 years old and mine is 9. Neither give us any issues. People are telling us we need to buy a new car before the arrival of our first baby at the end of the year. We’re not convinced. What do you think?
Time to Upgrade?
Dear Time to Upgrade,
When it comes to cars, just like playing cards, you gotta know when to hold’em, know when to fold’em, know when to walk away and know when to run!
Never buy a new car based on emotional reasons! It feels good to imagine ourselves in a brand new car. Most people love the smell of a new car; I know I do! We certainly are drawn to the latest safety features to protect our children. And the new models have loads of technology like a built in GPS, back up cameras, blind spot monitors and those glorious heated leather seats. What’s not to like about all of that?
But just because you are having a baby doesn’t mean it is time to get a new car. That is an emotionally-based decision and I say, run from that advice!
Buying and owning a new car is exciting and can be a good decision if your income allows you to purchase it without debt. But for most people, when the new car smell wears off and you’re left with payments, it’s a different story.
There are lots of benefits to a quality, well maintained, reliable used car. Let me share some stories and some reasons why I think you should walk away from any car that does not fit your budget.
Thirty-seven years ago, I bought a brand new Volvo just before the arrival of our first child. We bought it because it was rated the safest car on the road at the time (even though it did not have a single airbag). It was a great car that we drove for years, but it had issues with the air conditioner and brakes. We spent a lot of money keeping it maintained. Looking back, a used one would have served us just fine and been far easier on our budget. I should have just walked away from the lot the day I was convinced I had to have a brand new car for “safety reasons.”
Since that time, I’ve become a fan of owning used cars. My wife and I drive Toyotas: a 2006 Sienna and a 2007 4-Runner. All of my sons drive pre-owned cars; one still owns a Tacoma from the 80s! We chose to drive used cars because it is the best financial and spiritual decision for us.
Ann, my wife, recently confessed that when invited to a luncheon at a local high-end country club, she parked as far from the entrance as possible because of her cracked windshield and dirty exterior. She was embarrassed by the fact that her car did not appear as new or impressive as the other luxury models in the parking lot. Recognizing her pride, she realized it was a wake-up call to give thanks for a minivan that has served us faithfully for 13 years! In fact, it has never had to have a major repair in over 190,000 miles of service. We remain confident that we can drive it across the country without concern of a mechanical failure.
Luke 14:28 “For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it.
Buying new is expensive. The average new-car payment as of late last year was $523 per month with an average price tag of $31,455. Not only that, it will lose about 20% of its value the second you drive it off the lot. Most people cannot afford that kind of depreciation.
Payments for a used car are lower, but average $378 per month, which is still high for many households who are in debt and have no savings. The best option of all is to drive a car that you have paid cash for.
The world will give you lots of reasons to buy a new car. But, remember, a car is simply a way to get from point A to point B; it is not a fashion statement or a boost to your ego. An older, reliable car can be an excellent financial decision. And, it can keep you humble.
The average age of cars and trucks in America recently hit a record 11.8 years. Many hold onto their cars longer because of the length of financing. Montana claims the oldest average at 16.6 years and Vermont, the youngest at 9.9.
One of the best ways to get the most out of an existing car is to establish an auto maintenance fund in your budget. Monthly contributions will increase your ability to cover necessary repairs or routine maintenance.
Routine maintenance prevents costly repairs and adds years to the life of your vehicle. If you’re the handy type consider doing some of the work yourself. Check out these 6 tips.
If your older vehicle is unreliable and has had serious mechanical issues more than a time or two in its recent past, it may be time to get rid of it and start over. It is dangerous to get stranded in today’s world. It is also expensive and time consuming to have a vehicle in and out of the shop for repairs frequently. So do your homework. Analyze what you are paying in total costs: buying, maintaining and repairing what you have. Compare that to the cost of buying, maintaining and repairing an upgrade with fewer miles. If you have cash to buy a reliable used car, you will likely be much better off getting a better vehicle.
And, if you start a new car account while you’re driving your old ones, you can make monthly payments towards a future car. It will save you thousands of dollars in interest over time and earn interest while you’re saving.
The cheapest car to drive is usually the one you already own. Granted, if one is a gas hog you could consider a more efficient model. But, as long as yours are safe and reliable for a baby, as you seem to indicate, it’s time to hold’em. Drive them till they are worn out, save money and get ready for the day when it is time to make a change. By the way, the only thing you need to buy for certain is a quality car seat!
Originally published on the Christian Post, July 12, 2019
Dear Chuck,
My husband is tired of my overspending. I struggle living on the budget he’s made because I make quick purchases rather than planning ahead. Then I feel guilty defending my decisions when the bills arrive. How can I get out of this cycle?
Spontaneous Spender
Dear Spontaneous,
Frist, be thankful you have a husband who cares enough to make a budget. If only more people would do so!
Next, let’s deal with the cause for the spontaneous spending so you can escape the cycle you are in.
Money affects our emotions and our emotions affect our use of money. Experts understand this and market to your emotions – merchants from grocery stores, furniture marts, car dealerships, and online advertisers. They all target your feelings toward shopping. Learning to separate your identity from the things you buy will keep you from spending money to feel good. The term “retail therapy” implies that some people spend money to bolster their mood. It is a very real urge. I have experienced it myself and watched others do it as well.
I had a friend who was competing for a big promotion in his company. Over multiple interviews and several months of consideration of all candidates, management selected someone else over my friend. The very day that he learned he was not selected, he went out and purchased a brand new, expensive car. The problem was he could not afford the car without the promotion but he had been dreaming of it for so long that he bought it anyway. In his own words he told me that it was “retail therapy”.
God’s Word makes it clear that we enter the world naked and we leave naked…and naked has no pockets. Since we can’t take any purchases with us when we die, we should become emotionally neutral towards our spending choices.
Certain emotional triggers can cause people to spend money. A few of the most common include:
Can you relate to any of these?
People justify spending when they are emotional because spending momentarily feels good. But, decisions based on feelings often create financial problems that further complicate life.
We cannot buy happiness. Spending and accumulating more money may not increase our wellbeing and can actually have a negative effect. But, wisely managing money, as a steward of God, is fulfilling.
If you have true needs, take them before the Lord. The Apostle Paul teaches:
…do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6-7 ESV)
When did you last thank God for who He is and what He has done for you? Are you seeking satisfaction from people or things rather than the only One who can truly satisfy?
Thankfulness delays our need for instant gratification. Meditating on what God has provided can calm our emotions and prevent budget wrecking purchases. Couple that with generosity and a heart of compassion, and our contentment can soar, bringing positive thoughts to light.
Set your mind on things above, not on things that are on the earth. (Colossians 3:2 ESV)
In so doing, you will find that your heart becomes satisfied with the riches of Christ that are of much greater value than the things of this world.
A Final Tip
Consider some of Crown’s resources to help you and your husband get on the same page. My wife and I wrote a book together on this very topic. You can find it here and access numerous free resources on the Crown website. Thanks again for writing.
Originally published on the Christian Post, July 5, 2019
